Tonight, I went to a yoga class called BarreWorks at a studio near my place.
According to the blurb on the website, the class is, “an energetic blend of ballet, core conditioning, and muscle strengthening. Exercises at the ballet barre and mat are followed by active stretching in order to sculpt the long, lean muscles of the dancer’s body. Each hour long class will burn calories, tone, reshape, and improve overall posture.”
Let’s cut the bullshit. The instructor looked at us, my friend and I when we walked in, and asked us if we had ever tried this type of class before. Neither of us had and her response was, “Oh! Well this is not your typical type of yoga. You girls might want to mentally prepare yourselves. You are in for a treat.” Of course. Great. I just wanted a challenging session of hot, sweaty yoga. I though the barre aspect would be a fun way of incorporating that. Instead, it was all challenge the whole time. I didn’t have the fight in me tonight, so I half-assed my way through the entirety of the workout. And left pissed at myself and the instructor.
Cut the bullshit. I paid you money to give me a yoga inspired workout. I get that you are a beautiful dancer who knows exactly how to twist and turn your body so that you can do these moves with ease, and you with your muscles that are strong and toned can do all challenging series of moves. HOWEVER! IF YOU TOOK A MOMENT TO CUT THE BULLSHIT, YOU WOULD SEE THAT IM A COLLEGE STUDENT WHO SWEATS ON HER WALK TO AND FROM CLASS WITH SORE CALF AND SHIN MUSCLES AND A HUNCHED BACK FROM MY FIFTY POUND BACKPACK! A COLLEGE STUDENT WHO ALSO DOESNT ENJOY AB WORK AND LIKES TO DRINK BEER! BRING ON THE BEER BELLY!
Needless to say, I am already extremely sore and irritated that this instructor couldn’t take the time to level out her workout for the majority of the class so that I could’ve left feeling a little less defeated. Oh well, nothing like a big challenge and an ass whopping to be the metaphor for my life lately. Kick me while I am down is the motto, makes me stronger in the end so watch out everyone. So maybe I need to cut the bullshit.