I feel behind..

I need time to vent. Since this is my space to fill as I’d like, I am going to talk out my frustrations for a bit. I am in my evening class right now listening to a lesson about how to have effective class meetings. We are being walked through a book called Dream by Susan Bosnak. I forgot to order it and overlooked the email that was sent out last week as a reminder to get it and bring it to class tonight. My brain hurts. I have a geometry assignment due tomorrow which is unfinished, I’m not even half way done. I have a lesson plan that I will be presenting tomorrow morning over how to incorporate rhythm into literacy time in the classroom….that has not even been started. I have a line of learning due at midnight that needs to be finished. I have two classes that I need to finish that are web-based by December. I have bills to pay, such as another parking ticket I racked up this morning. I have to work every day this week. I have clothes to be put away at home. I have cleaning to do. I have emails and texts and phone calls to respond to, and honestly  I think I’m just going to drift away for a bit. I can’t kick the reality that I am constantly behind this semester. I can’t keep up. I’m trying to get ahead but I just feel like I’m sinking in cold water. It’s uncomfortable here and I wan’t to get ahead.

This is the moment I think one would feel while they are out at sea, alone and a bit scared. Exhausted and tired from the fight. I have to keep my sights set on the horizon. Victory is soon to come. I just need to fight the good fight. It already feels worth it. I know I left the island for a reason. Comfortable isn’t what I want. I want to learn to dance in the rain.

 

I just need to adjust my sails.

 

“She stood in the storm, and when the wind did not blow her way, she adjusted her sails.” – Elizabeth Edwards

 

L

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