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passwords and deadlines

two things i hate. 

The Finish Line is Near

Hi darlings, 

So today marks the start of my Thanksgiving Break. I have until about 12pm until I can call it official, but the end is so near. In a few hours, I will be on my way to take the final exam of the last of my online summer classes. Yes…you did indeed read that correctly. I did say summer. At the University I attend, these courses are called Guided Independent Studies courses. This means that students have the option of completing these course in one or two semesters. I had originally intended to complete these over the course of my summer, but instead put them off when life got crazy balancing jobs and I took on a new course load in the fall. I had until Dec. 1st to finish it all up, so thankfully I have cranked it all out in time.

Wish me luck! 

After that, I am hopping in my car and zooming back to Des Moines and enjoy Thanksgiving with my wonderful family. I’m quite the highway goddess these days. 

Hope everyone has a happy Thanksgiving! 

 

Much love, 

Lindzzzzzzzzz xoxox 

you will catch me sitting in the corner of a coffee shop, contemplating life’s craziness. On days like today, I use music as my muse. I hide my face in a book, learning all that the world can teach me in an effort to grow and expand the idiosyncrasies of my own mind. I just want the answers, God…. Why can’t I understand it all?

For now, I think I’ll name my first pet Chimera….why you ask? Go look it up. 😉

In the end, I just need to be alone. Lonely is freeing when you are one with your own thoughts.

Odi et amo

Odi et amo. Quare id faciam, fortasse requiris. Nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior.

A friend shared this quote with me a little over a year ago. It’s a deep, Roman poem called Catallus 85. While the meaning has been long studied, I think the general gist of the story says many relevant things.

The hardest part of love is understanding the torment of emotions.

I’m fearful of ruining this one, but I’m feeling really happy and I want to cultivate this one!

Thank God for the man who walked into my life this summer and tiptoed politely when everything was going to shit. Thank God for this man for coming back to the rescue when the storm clouds began to drift away. Thank God for his strength through his own personal woes, his sarcastic yet gentle sense of humor, his ability to connect with my own quirkiness, his ability to motivate me when I am feeling defeated, and his respect of my lifestyle and busy times…

 

I’m so silly for not paying attention to the signs until now, but my heart is warming a bit. 

 

Thanks to you, playa. 😉 

And then one day, you decide to follow your heart. And you realize that life can be kinda magical when you do.

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Curly-Haired and Fresh-Faced

that’s the name of the game for me today. I woke up late, showered, styled my hair in its natural state (it’s been forever since I’ve let it go natural curly), and skipped on make-up. It felt a bit intimidating to stand up in front of the class and present today in my natural state, but it was also a bit freeing. Like saying to everyone, “Well, this is me. Take it or leave it.”

Reminds me of my freshmen year when I took an art class where we learned to sketch the human body. Part of course was using live models, so… I, alongside my other classmates, spent three weeks studying the naked human body as an art form. It was a surreal experience when the live models came into the classroom and we were asked to draw them. It became natural to stare at anoter person, studying their body, really getting to know the person as a beautiful piece of art.

Have you ever wanted to do that? Just see a person face-to-face, in their purest form, and take the time to breathe them in? It’s like when you don’t see someone for a long period of time and you picture what they look like in your head. You try to rememeber their face, their hands, their lips, their stature, the types of clothes they would wear…etc. 

Isn’t it strange to think that all of that is merely just a version that represents the way we see the other person. It is entirely different from how the person looks in reality, but instead it’s a mixture of all the things that make that specific person beautiful to us.

 

Think about that for a moment…

 

When you don’t get to know a person in their truest form, you miss out on the opportunity to take them in when they are their most exposed, just like the nude models in my art class…

There is nothing quite as freeing as standing in front of a person, whether it be curly-haired and fresh-faced or absolutely nude, and saying, “Hey. This is me. Take it or leave it. This is all I have to offer.”

I challenge you to go about your day being exposed. Put those walls down when you can and challenge others in your life to accept you for you.

The feeling of aceptance when you connect with another person in your nude form is absolutely beautiful.

Love to the world,

Lindsey Kay xoxoxo

To all those self-proclaimed “good girls” out there, here is my PSA:

Babe, I know how you feel. We all have a dark side, and sometimes it’s better to own it….:) Can you see my smirk through the screen?

Damn…. just listen to this little jam!

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