You and I. Let’s sit right down and have a little discussion, face-to-face, up close and personal. I want to look across at you, stare into your being and have you fess up to everything… right here. right now.
Ever feel like having those conversations with yourself? I do. The kind where I’m ready and willing to lift myself by the shoulders with a tight grip and slam my ass down at the interrrogation table. I need to drill myself for a bit and force the conversation until everything has been said that needs to be put into words. I need to ask myself about where it is that I really want to go, how I want to get there, and what I’m willing to sacrifice in order to get there.
There are only six days left of 2013. As the new year approaches, I can’t help but look to the future in hope of better and brighter things ahead. 2013 was a tough year for me full of lots of growth within myself personally and academically. There are lot’s of things that I am thankful for and also many moments of lessons learned. I have been blessed with a life that isn’t intended to be a cake walk and for good reason. As I go through the tough times, I contiually walk away with a lesson that I carry with me to apply in all that I do moving forward.
I think today as I sit and type this little post out, I speak to myself in saying: “It’s time that we had the talk, Lindsey.” “It’s time for you to look within yourself to be that person; daughter, sister, friend, grandaughter, roommate, future educator, student, etc., that you’ve alway dreamt of being.”
As hard as it is to admit, I think I got a little sidetrack in making everything happen for myself that I lost focus in who I desire to be as I grow. Sometimes it’s difficult to define. For now, I just most wish for the ability to forgive myself for the mistakes I made throughout the year of 2013. I wish for the ability to forgive those that may have hurt me throughout the year of 2013. I wish to forget the moments of despair and simply rememeber the good.
People experience much worse on a day-to-day basis than I experienced in all of my 2013 year of life. Even so, I must allow myself to reflect and then move forward.
Here’s to all of the possibilities in the world.